Ugly Feet
by Emily Horne 2/1/2013
Hello my name is Emily, and I have ugly feet.
But I just flop them out there, screw
being discreet.
Hideous! Deformed! Misshapen and
battered!
Anything short of 'mutant' and I'm
flattered.
First off, they’re HUGE. Like big ol'
pink flippers.
Size 10 ½ wide, if I use the big
clippers.
My second toe (Lucy) is as long as a
lighter
With Lucy and Biggin's, I'm a
prizewinning toe fighter
I can pinch you so hard it'll make you
bruise
You'll beg me to stop and to put on
some shoes
I digress, apologize, I'm not here to
boast
I'll tell you what has my podiatrist
engrossed.
These bunions, you see, these big
protruding bones?
They aren't warts, or growths, or look
like Davy Jones...
It just happens to be the way my
tootsies are shaped
They don't look half bad when they’re
sanded and scraped
A few coats of good polish, bright red- if
you please
and a cute pair of sandals to let in
the breeze
Maybe I should hide them, just put them
away...
But not one solitary fuck was given this day.
