Poetry: Dirty Socks

Dirty Socks

by Emily Horne  1/24/13

In my little world, I am in charge of clean socks.

You'll wash them yourself? To that I say bollox!

Huffing and puffing and blowing my house in.

Not a clean sock in sight, let's get out the violin.

Ok, I'll wash some, although the sock is arbitrary

I mean, I've washed 'em it before, it's not revolutionary

But, I've gone nuts, gone mad and about to shave a mohawk

But it's got so little to do with your dirty fucking sock.

I'm real, and I'm smart and I'm undeniably clever

I embrace each adventure and encourage endeavor.

I have more to give than I can even withhold

If I let it all out, it would grow tenfold.

But I don’t, 'cause I can't, 'cause there is dirt in my grout

and the kids need a bath and we are out of sauerkraut.

This damn laundry (along with your socks),

is 3 feet high and is unwilling to stop

Dishes, and dinner and the run-of-the-mill

Excuse me, sorry, do you have a sleeping pill?

This is the part of the poem where I make it okay

to eat the shit sandwich and spirit away

But I can't, so I wont, so at the end of this ditty

Your socks are still dirty, and I have no fucking pity.

Poetry: Bella Franchesca Divine

Bella Franchesca Divine

by Emily Horne 1/21/13

For Bella Franchesca Divine
Being Bowlegged's just fine
A pigeon-toed beauty
A cross-eyed cutie

Just don't ask her to walk a straight line

See, my Bella Franchesca

She often reminded me of Tesla

the whirlwind of energy she created

when she prowled around and eventually mated

Oh, wait, did I forget to disclose?

That Bella is my cat, and she has 24 toes.

But hold on to your hats, folks, this one's a doozy

My Bella, my cat, is one helluva floozy.

A polydact, six toes on each paw

Hemmingway's cats- they shared the same flaw

I'm betting his cats weren’t quite so salacious

I have a bad feeling her hoohah is... hmmm... spacious?

Okay, maybe that's a bit mean

I mean, I don't want to be obscene

Honestly I have to say I'm impressed.

I mean, you'd think she'd be depressed.

Extra toes, bow-legged and cross eyed?

Appearance withstanding she pounces with pride.

The moral of this twisted kitty tale

Your fugly can be right off the Richter scale

Just take a note from Bella Franchesca Divine

Shake whatcha mamma gave you

and you'll be one sexy feline.

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Thursday Love

Two Portraits

The evolution of my photography has led me to these two shots today.

Maggie, looking into the sunset at Jamie and Chelsea's wedding.

Chelsea herself at the edge of a wonderfully strange canyon.